Navigating the Loss of a Loved One

Loss can change everything.

When someone we love dies, the world as we knew it shifts. Life moves on, but we may not feel ready to move with it. In those moments, it can feel like we’re standing still while everything else keeps spinning. As a life coach, and someone who has experienced grief and also walked with others through grief, I want to offer some thoughts that might help you take one small, compassionate step at a time.

1. Give Yourself Permission to Feel

Grief doesn’t follow a script. It doesn’t arrive in neat stages or on a schedule. It can feel like sadness, anger, numbness, confusion, guilt—or all of these at once. From a coaching perspective, the first invitation is this: allow yourself to feel what is. Don’t rush to fix it. Don’t judge your process. Simply acknowledge where you are, knowing it’s okay not to be okay.

2. Ask: What Do I Need Right Now?

In the early days of loss, survival might be all you can manage. But as time moves on, make some space for small but significant questions. 

A gentle one to start with is: "What do I need today?”

Maybe it's rest. Maybe it’s connection. Maybe it’s a moment to breathe, journal, pray, or take a walk. Tuning into your needs is an act of care that builds the foundation for healing.

3. Recognise the Voice of Guilt—and Gently Challenge It

Many people wrestle with guilt in grief: Did I do enough? Say enough? Why didn't I...? Take some time to pause and explore these thoughts, not to silence them, but to understand where they come from. Try this: "If a friend were feeling this guilt, what would I say to them?”

Now speak that same kindness to yourself. You deserve it.

4. Find Meaning in the Memory

Taking time to reflect in our grief is vital. Instead of trying to "move on”, taking time to consider how to move forward with the memory is really healthy. Here’s a couple of questions which might help:

What did this person bring into your life?

What values of theirs do you carry now?

How might you honour their legacy in small, intentional ways?

This isn’t about putting a positive spin on pain. It’s about recognising that even in the ache, meaning can emerge.

5. You Don’t Have to Walk Alone

Grief is deeply personal, but it’s not meant to be lived in isolation. Finding a safe, non-judgemental space to process, reflect, and move forward at your own pace is so important. Sometimes, just having someone to listen, to really hear you without trying to fix you, is what makes all the difference.

Final Thought: Let Grace Lead

If you're navigating loss right now, let grace, not pressure, be your guide. Healing isn't linear. Some days will feel heavier than others. Some moments will surprise you with joy. That’s okay. You’re not failing, you’re human.

Small steps can create really great change. When it comes to grief, even standing still and breathing can be the most courageous step of all.

These are just a few ways which hopefully help. If you or someone you love is grieving, and you’d like support through coaching or conversation, I’d be honoured to walk with you.

You’re not alone. Your story matters. And healing is possible, one gentle step at a time.